A bank robbery usually needs a note, a getaway plan, and nerves of steel. This one apparently needed a kitten too.
Police in Prince George’s County, Maryland, arrested a man on July 13 after he allegedly stole a three-month-old kitten from a pet store, carried her across a parking lot into a PNC Bank, and used her as some kind of prop during a botched robbery attempt. The kitten, a black and white tuxedo named Magnolia, was found safe and unharmed once officers got things sorted out.
According to police and the animal rescue that had been caring for Magnolia, the man walked into a Pet Supplies Plus, grabbed the kitten from her adoption area while staff had their backs turned, and ran straight across the shopping center to the bank next door. Once inside, Fox News reported that he handed Magnolia to a bank employee and asked them to hold her while he wrote out a note demanding cash.
It did not work. Officers arrived quickly, took the man into custody inside the bank, and recovered Magnolia unharmed. No one was hurt, and the only thing anyone made off with that morning was a good story.
A Kitten With Questionable Taste in Accomplices
Employees at the pet store told local reporters the man had been coming in nearly every day for a couple of weeks, always beelining for the same kitten. Whether that counts as planning or just a guy who really liked one particular cat is up for debate.
Either way, using a kitten as a distraction technique is a new one, and it is safe to say it will not be showing up in any heist movie sequels anytime soon. Real criminals bring ski masks. This one apparently brought a foster pet.
Police Response Looked Bigger Than Expected
A volunteer with the rescue group caring for Magnolia said she happened to be nearby when she saw a wave of patrol cars roll up and assumed, understandably, that it was an unusually serious response to a stolen cat. It turned out the cars were headed for the bank, where the attempted robbery was already unfolding.
Sometimes the story behind the story is even stranger than the first version you hear, and this is one of those times.
Magnolia Is Back and Looking for a Home
Magnolia was found safe in the bank manager’s office, apparently no worse for wear after her brief detour into a life of crime. The rescue organization that handles her adoption said she is playful, affectionate, and ready to find a permanent family, one that presumably does not involve any bank visits.
Store staff and rescue volunteers both said she handled the whole ordeal better than most people would.
The suspect faces charges related to the attempted robbery, and police say the investigation is ongoing. As for Magnolia, her days of being anyone’s unwilling accomplice appear to be over. From here on out, the only thing she should be stealing is a spot on someone’s couch.